The divine feminine aspect of wanting more

Do you want more? If not, why?

Nature promotes growth and expansion, so why do we deny ourselves from wanting more and growing?

Women are biologically and spiritually designed to create and receive. Just look at the physiology of women and their wombs. Unfortunately, most women deny these innate divine gifts and it can be detrimental to their health.

What are your beliefs that limit your ability to accept your desires? Do you wish you were making more money, but frequently offer your services for free or charge less than you know you’re worth because you think people won’t want to pay your fees? Are you exhausted running on empty but refusing to ask for someone to help take the load off you? Do you feel like it’s wrong to want what you want? Like it’s too much to have? Why? How does this rejection of what you want manifest in your body? Are you anxious? Depressed? Have digestive issues because it’s too hard to receive and assimilate what you want into your life? Do you suffer from an autoimmune disease like Hashimoto’s thyroiditis because you are out of touch with your inner communication that’s telling you to claim what you desire?

As an intuitive health coach, one of the biggest patterns I see in women is their rejection and fear of getting what they truly want causing resistance and pent-up energy to not be released. As a result, this can develop into an autoimmune disease, infertility, anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue, and more. Denial of our desires makes us suffer, it doesn’t make us selfish.

Crazy talk you say! Let me explain.

The masculine way of creating is very much effort-based, muscling and powering your way to get what you want. Doing, doing, doing, and working hard. In turn, the feminine way of creating is an effortless flow that requires one:

1. To feel and recognize your desires;

2. Own your desire;

3. Align to your desire and release any obstacles or mindset blocks and attract it;

4. Be vulnerable and share your desire so others can help;

5. Embrace and receive your desire;

6. Fulfillment.

The process of owning your desire whether that entails receiving or creating, requires the courage to open your awareness that you have a desire and the courage to be vulnerable by expressing that desire to herself, others and the universe. Women are so socially and subconsciously programmed to reject their desires because they think they’re selfish for wanting so much, or that it’s an either or scenario-- “I can either have X or Y.”

“If I get X, this person/ people will suffer.”

“I can be either a good wife and mother or a successful businesswoman.”

“I can do everything for everyone before my own needs or I can ‘be selfish’ and take care of myself first,” etc.

Sound familiar?

In addition, many women fill their minds with lies that they don’t deserve to have more or others will judge us for having “so much,” you’re not ready to get what you truly want, etc. or whatever other excuse they make up.

When women can’t receive or create what they truly desire, it goes against nature and their own energy and vibration gets off balance. Energy can build up creating anxiety because it has nowhere to be released. Conversely, it can build up so much over time it becomes stagnant and heavy which can manifest itself as depression, chronic fatigue, excess weight or infertility. Autoimmune diseases are the body’s sign that you are resisting creating or receiving and there lacks self love. For example, many times multiple sclerosis develops when a person resists asking for help and receiving so much to the point that MS develops forcing this person to receive the help of others as mobility decreases.

This is BS. It’s time for a collective mindset shift among women to stop the female suffering and suppression of our natural ability to create and receive. No more living with a mindset of being in constant survival mode and stagnation. Thoughts like these can make us sick and crazy, which has been scientifically proven in such books like The Biology of Belief, Mind Body Code, E-Squared: Nine Do-It-Yourself Energy Experiments That Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality, Mind of Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself and many of Louise Hay’s books such as Heal Your Body and The Power is within You.

Still don’t believe me? Autoimmune diseases are much more prevalent in women than men. In the U.S., approximately 8% of the population suffers from autoimmune diseases, 78% of whom are women (1). Women are 2-4 times more likely to suffer from chronic fatigue syndrome (2). Infertility rates among females are more prominent in South and Central Asia, Sub-Saharan Africa, North Africa/Middle East, and Central/Eastern Europe (3), parts of the world where patriarchy rules and people tend to live in scarcity. According to the World Health Organization, 1 in 3 women suffer from depression, anxiety and somatic complaints (4). If these facts aren’t a slap in the face, I don’t know what is.

How do we stop this unhealthy mindset of rejecting our desires?

First, we have to recognize that we desire something and visualize what we and others would gain from getting what we want.

1. Ask yourself honestly, what do you truly want?

2. Recognize what’s so important about getting what you want.

3. Think about what will happen to you if you get what you want.

4. Imagine how that would feel in your body and on an energetic/ spiritual level if you got what you want. What you and others say to yourself? What are you doing? How do you look? How does your energy and body feel?

5. Think about any possible negative outcomes that might happen if we got what we wanted and what fears and limiting beliefs we might have to let go of.

6. Release the fear and untrue beliefs.

7. Align and receive your desire. For most women, it’s just a matter of trusting it will come to you in the right moment and not being in effort or resistance to it.

We women we need to embrace our desire to create and receive for our sanity and physical health. It’s not selfish. It’s our divine right.

I urge you to explore and challenge your beliefs around having and see how much more you can have, grow and transform when you open yourself up to receiving and creating what you want.

Look for more support around attracting what you truly want?

Check out my Female Wellness Healing package.

Sources

1. Fairweather D, Rose NR. Women and Autoimmune Diseases1. Emerg Infect Dis. 2004 Nov;10(11):2005–11.

2. Office on Women’s Health, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Chronic fatigue syndrome. September 04, 2014. http://www.womenshealth.gov/publications/our-publications/fact-sheet/chronic-fatigue-syndrome.html

3. Mascarenhas, M. N., Flaxman, S. R., Boerma, T., Vanderpoel, S., & Stevens, G. A. (2012). National, Regional, and Global Trends in Infertility Prevalence Since 1990: A Systematic Analysis of 277 Health Surveys. PLoS Medicine,9(12), e1001356. http://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pmed.1001356

4. World Health Organization. Gender disparities and mental health: The Facts. Gender and women's mental health. http://www.who.int/mental_health/prevention/genderwomen/en/